10 Laws of Boundaries and Interpersonal Effectivness

When learning how to be the most effective in relationships we not only need to learn the criteria of when to say no and when to say yes, it is nice to have additional criteria to build from. This is information that is found in the book Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. JohnContinue reading “10 Laws of Boundaries and Interpersonal Effectivness”

Interpersonal Effectiveness: Criteria for Saying Yes and No

Do you know how to effectively say YES and NO? The following is the DBT criteria for how to learn the intensity and the criteria on asking for a need to be met or for you to say no effectively and still maintain the relationship. At the end there is a game you can useContinue reading “Interpersonal Effectiveness: Criteria for Saying Yes and No”

Interpersonal Effectiveness: DEAR MAN

Want to learn how to effectively ask for what you WANT and what you NEED? DEAR MAN is the skill for you. Now that I have given you the sales pitch, I am sure you are wondering how true and effective this skill is. Why not try it? The following skill is one of theContinue reading “Interpersonal Effectiveness: DEAR MAN”

Introduction to Interpersonal Effectiveness

While we move into the section of Interpersonal Effectiveness of DBT it is important to know our goals and set a corse of what we are intending to learn. What is stopping you from having Healthy Relationships? Lack of skills Worried thoughts High or uncontrollable emotions Others get in your way You simply forget yourContinue reading “Introduction to Interpersonal Effectiveness”

Learning to reduce emotional vulnerabilities with the ABC Please Skill

The ABC Please skill are important for many reasons. We not only need a way to validate our emotions when they happen ( like we just learned in Fitting the Facts ) we also need to know all the different reasons our mood is impacted. Once we know those we can begin to apply SimpleContinue reading “Learning to reduce emotional vulnerabilities with the ABC Please Skill”

Emotion Regulation – Changing Emotion & Opposite Action

The following chart is an addition to what we have been learning about Emotions. Since we have been journeying through the Emotion Regulation part of DBT we have gotten to the Changing your Emotion and Opposite Action. This is where we move from validation into action. We identify the initial urge we feel when theContinue reading “Emotion Regulation – Changing Emotion & Opposite Action”

Problem Solving the DBT Way

When you have a problem ( any problem ) we can become overwhelmed in finding an answer. Often times we need some steps to help us get control of our emotions and know where to even begin. Problem Solving in DBT happens after we have realized that an emotion is justified ( or Fits theContinue reading “Problem Solving the DBT Way”

Grief around the Holidays

Dealing with grief this year is going to be tough for many families. I want to make sure you have the skills you need to stay on the path and keep using your DBT skills to help you though this time. How do you deal with grief? How have you been taught to deal withContinue reading “Grief around the Holidays”

Starting Mindfulness – What & How Skills

WHAT SKILLS OBSERVE Just Notice the experience. Watch your thoughts and feelings come and go like clouds in the sky. Do not push away your thoughts and feelings, just let them happen. Notice your body sessions – with all Senses (Seeing, smells, touch, taste, hearing)  Practice wordless watching Exercise: Take a quick 5-10 second glanceContinue reading “Starting Mindfulness – What & How Skills”